Why an orange...?

There was a mother who had 2 children.

One day, a dispute broke out between the children about an orange. 

What do parents do in this case?

Some of them remove the orange and send the children back to their room. There are some who give the orange to one child, promising to the other his turn will be next time. Some others cut the orange in two halves.

And that last option was the mother's choice. The orange was cut and the halves dispensed. Each of the children was attentive to the parity between the shares, but none seemed entirely satisfied.

And what happened then?

After having thrown away the orange's skin, one of the kids squeezed the pulp to obtain a small quantity of juice, while the other threw its pulp away and tried to use the maximum of the skin for making orange muffins. 

 

If the children's needs had been discussed before sharing the fruit, everyone could have received all what they actually needed. 

 

In our society, we are used either to avoiding conflict, to a win-lose solution, or to get a compromise, in which each part is only half satisfied. 

However, mediation based on nonviolent communication leads to a resolution satisfying both parties. 

Professional conflict resolution leads to: 

  • Identify and express both parts' needs
  • Hear and understand others' needs
  • Learn to listen without judging
  • Formulate requests
  • Negotiate the best resolutions possible

That's why the image of an orange comes to my mind every time I think of successful communication with win-win outcomes and long-term satisfaction.