MARRIAGE AND FAMILY CONFLICT RESOLUTION. MEDIATION

mediation HCMC

CONFLICT RESOLUTION = MEDIATION

is a process of bringing together persons between whom the communication has stopped to work.

When we understand the needs that motivate our own and others’ behaviour, we have no enemies.

 

Throughout mediation, I invite my clients to get a deeper understanding of what is driving their and the other side's behaviour, in a safe environment.

Connection comes when we first talk about people’s needs, and the second time,  when discussing strategies likely to work in order to fulfil both sides' needs.

 

What happens during mediation process

Mediation is a process where disconnected people can:

  • Hear their own needs
  • Hear each other’s needs
  • Make requests
  • Built new strategies
  • Model a deep connection based on understanding, trust and peace
  • Stay present and listen without judgment
  • learn to translate what someone says and does into language of needs 
  • uncover what needs are animating them
  • reach the agreement

 

What is the mediator's role?

The mediator's role is to let two disconnected people express their pain and say their needs out loud. I tend to verify the mutual understanding.

I create  space for connection by giving time, respect and security to both sides. At this level, mediation frees the relationship from any possible misunderstanding and intense emotions. 

Once mutual respect and collaboration spirit are there, requests can be formulated. The mediator's role is to supervise guidelines likely to lead to their fulfillment leaving both sides satisfied.  The mediator encourages parties to reach  their own agreement.

The mediator is always impartial and neutral. 

It's rare that two people have the same awareness of how to deal with conflict, so you can start the process of conflict resolution before your partner is ready.

By meeting first the person who contacted me, we can work on clarifying the process, modelling of what is to be expected in the mediation, how to listen and how to engage the other into the process. 

If I don’t understand you, I may be angry at you, all the time.

- Thich Nhat Hanh

NO TO COMPROMISE

It’s important to know that we never look for so-called compromise, knowing that it takes sacrifices from both sides already affected by suffering. We can only obtain connection, understanding and peace by acknowledging and empathising with needs.